Shoot to thrill
Yet again, the local press is wagging a finger at the availability of fake or replica guns. This isn’t the first time fake fire arms have been brought to our attention but I wonder whether the real issue has been overlooked. Why are these guns made to look so authentic in the first place? When I was a lad, I ran around making faux machine gun noises. What boys didn’t (maybe the ones playing jump rope with the girls?).
My point is, the people that should be playing with toy guns don’t give a hoot how realistic the gun looks - they’re too busy fighting off elves and goblins or the pesky Vader in all his masked splendour. Kids really aren’t that bothered.
When I was a wee fella your average stick was enough for myself and chums. Often a gun wasn’t even necessary - the onus was more on how convincing your gun noise was. The fact that these replica guns are available only to people over 17 makes it more laughable. If you’re 17 or over and happen to find yourself in an establishment that is offering replica guns, and you can’t decide between the Uzi 9mm and the Walther P990, then you should:
A) Have a word with yourself and find a slightly less worrying hobby.
B) Go back to school and realise it’s far easier to try and get an education and a job that pays a shit wage than it is trying to haggle 60 quid off some poor shop assistant that just wants to go home and look at his replica guns.
The hoodie problem continues; film at eleven.
Posted by Gen. ‘Buck’ Turgidson
December 5th, 2006